when the visits stop; part 1

In the period following your spouse/partner’s funeral, you were probably caught up in a flurry of visits and invitations from family and friends.

Not to mention the tasks of legal and financial paperwork.

These activities can provide both distraction and comfort from the pain of loss.

Once all the distraction has begun to taper off however, you may find yourself feeling:

· The pain of your loss more acutely as the initial shock wears off.

· A sense of abandonment, both by your spouse and others you depend on.

· A sense of being unsettled, as you ask yourself “Where do I go from here?”

· Overwhelmed by the challenge of how to put your life back together again.

There are several ways to deal with these reactions as they come up during this period.

We’ll have some helpful tips in our next post.


Anonymous said...

This was without a doubt the toughest time for me during the grieving process-when everyone went home and back to their lives and I was sitting on the floor of my house surrounded by death certificates. That's when the loss of my husband really hit me!I felt everything that was mentioned in this post-and more. There was so much to do, so many details that had to be taken care of, so many people to notify-it was overwhelming. It is extremely difficult to be productive when you are flooded with emotions. I don't know about you, but I have a hard time being able to speak while crying. This is the time to really cut yourself a lot of slack, be gentle, and prioritize as much as you can. I made lists and did what needed to be done right away and left the rest for "later". Take "bite size" pieces of everything you are suddenly confronted with, be good to yourself and as always....breathe.

Laurie and Ruth said...

Thanks for sharing your experiences about that difficult time, Deb!

You really convey just how overwhelming it can be.

Your advice about how to get through those times is excellent.