great resources for military widowed

If your partner/spouse was in the armed services, these previous posts offer valuable links to supportive resources:

- Resources for Military Survivors
- Updates in Veteran’s Benefits Website

Check them out.

Please let us know if you’ve discovered any additional information that would be helpful to our readers.

Ours thoughts and best wishes are with anyone who has lost a loved one in service to our country.


when should i stop wearing my wedding ring and other timelines about widowhood; part 3

Our series of posts about important timeline questions continues:

*When should I start visiting the gravesite?

Have you visited your late spouse/partner’s grave since the funeral?

If not, do you find you just can’t bring yourself to go? Even when family and friends offer to accompany you?

Do you feel guilty because this ritual is one a widowed partner is supposed to observe?

Actually, there are no “rules” about this. Although some faiths mark the end of the first year of mourning by observing a memorial for the deceased, visiting the gravesite is otherwise a very personal choice.

While some people find regular visits comforting, others find it too upsetting and choose not to visit. Some visit only on special occasions or holidays.

As with all other aspects of mourning, you should trust your own sense of what feels right for you. It’s okay to give yourself as much time as you need before you’re ready to take this step.

*When Will My Mourning Be Over?

(Excerpted from our book, Lost My Partner – What’ll I Do? Revised and Expanded Edition).

The mourning process is often described as feeling as though you’re stuck on a roller-coaster.

Nobody chooses this ride, but once it starts, you have to hold on tight and trust you’ll eventually be back on solid ground. The first few dips can be unsettling, and just when the track straightens out and you think you can finally relax, there may be a few more dips before you get to the finish.

The hopeful news is, if you don’t try to jump out before the ride ends, and if you have someone (or a group) beside you for support, the dips will come less frequently, and you’ll recover more quickly.

“How long will this ride take?”

In most cultures of the world, the period of mourning is traditionally one year, however, the answer is different for everyone. (read more)