8/29/16

10 quotes for getting through the days

Here are some of our favorite quotes for support through the mourning process.

Have any special quotes that have inspired you? Please share them with us by clicking on "comments" following this post.

1) Always remember that the future comes one day at a time.
---Dean Acheson

2)What we have once enjoyed deeply we can never lose. All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.
---Helen Keller

3) If we don't change, we don't grow. If we don't grow, we aren't really living.
---Gail Sheehy

4) I will love the light for it shows me the way. Yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.
---Og Mandino

5) Every time you don't follow your inner guidance, you feel a loss of energy, loss of power, a sense of spiritual deadness.
---Shakti Gawain

6) Never run away from anything. Never!
---Sir Winston Churchill

7) Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.
---Arnold Bennett

8) Change alone is eternal, perpetual, immortal.
---Arthur Schopenhauer

9) If there is no struggle, there is no progress.
---Frederick Douglass

10) To weep is to make less the depth of grief.
---William Shakespeare

8/4/16

young, widowed and isolated; part 2



In Part 1 of this topic, we looked at how isolated and different you can feel by not having anyone your own age who can truly understand your bereavement experience.

Here are six useful tips for coping:

1) Although your friends may not be able to relate emotionally to what you’re going through, they can help in other ways. Try suggesting some specific tasks or chores they can assist with.

2) Check out online resources, such as GriefNet.org, for specialized support groups for young widowed (GriefNet’s online groups are monitored by a clinical psychologist). The Dougy Centers (dougy.org), while offering groups for children, also provide or can refer you to groups for the young widowed.

3) Also go to the Young Widow Bulletin Board (through YoungWidow.org), an online community for exchanging experiences, information, and support for young widowed of both genders.

4) Be sure to look for “widowed” groups, which are specifically for those who have lost a spouse/partner. “Bereavement” groups usually include those who have suffered other types of loss, such as a parent or child.

5) Don’t reject a widowed group with older people. Even with age differences, members can have some useful perspectives to offer.

6) Check your local newspaper community listings for widowed groups in your area. Or contact the Social Services Department of your local hospital/hospices for referrals.

REMEMBER: Give yourself lots of time to process everything that’s hit you.

8/1/16

young, widowed and isolated: part 1



You’re still young and your spouse/partner has died.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

Not so soon.

Not when your dreams and plans for the future were based on the assumption there would be many more years ahead.

Suddenly you have to juggle financial issues.

And, if you’re a parent, your children’s emotional and physical needs.

On top of all that, being widowed young can leave you feeling isolated and different.

That’s because:

a) Odds are, none of your friends or most people your age can relate to what you’re now going through. Those who have been divorced may tell you they can understand the pain and anxiety you’re experiencing, but they don’t realize there’s a big difference between losing a partner to divorce and having a partner die. Death is final. Their former partner is still alive somewhere.

b) There’s the expectation from others (and maybe yourself), that because your loss has occurred early in life, you can bounce back more quickly than an older survivor. This may result in well-meaning family and friends urging you to “get on with your life” and pressure you about dating before you’re ready.

In Part 2, we’ll offer six proven tips for handling the problem of isolation.